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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28708884">Good Guys Never Win</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lemonomin/pseuds/lemonomin'>lemonomin</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Attraction at first sight, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, cold summer setting</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 09:47:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,026</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28708884</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lemonomin/pseuds/lemonomin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It's unhealthy, Jeno thinks, to like Jaemin so much.</p><p>𝘔𝘢𝘥. 𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘥. Jeno thinks, is what Renjun will call him if he would know, so he doesn't say anything, hides his ugly secret in the darkest places in his mind, hoping no one will ever find it. </p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Good Guys Never Win</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p>It's unhealthy, Jeno thinks, to like Jaemin so much. Likes the faint curve of Jaemin's lips when he smiles, likes the way the row of his perfect teeth with strange fangs would show when he beams too wide. Likes the way Jaemin's blonde hair budges much as soft forest grass even with the small of his movements. Likes the way Jaemin's eyes turns brighter with the bluest skies, his long lashes forming shadows on his cheeks every time he blinks. Likes his straight thick brows that looks darker with the color of his hair. Likes the way the low rumble of Jaemin's deep voice reverberates through his bones whenever he talks his honeyed words sweeter than any sugar covered in fruit jellies. Likes the smell of his perfume that wafts through the cool air whenever he's near, making Jeno's stomach clenched with thirst of his scent. Likes the way the simplest of Jaemin's touches with his warm hands would seep into his whole being, comforting and safe, and Jeno would melt into him as he aches for more. Likes the appearance of Jaemin's clothes that clings to skin while his body shifts with it, shoulders strong and broad. Jeno watches him, like a hawk, like he wants to tear him limb from limb. These are the thoughts that twists and turns inside Jeno's head, unwavering, deteriorating, and driving him insane. </p><p> </p><p><em>Mad. You're mad.</em> Jeno thinks, is what Renjun will call him if he would know, so he doesn't say anything, hides his ugly secret in the darkest places in his mind, hoping no one will ever find it. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It was the last days of winter when Jeno first met Jaemin.The last semester of the school year ended, and their graduation took place two days ago in their high school where he grabbed the ticket of freedom, dressed like a noble man on the stage. Those were memorable years, with the pages of all the books he read, the emptied pen tubes and missing pen lids, his strict teachers and parentlike advisers, his friendly classmates that happened to occupy a space in his heart, and the embodiment of all those that is Huang Renjun. His closest friend. </p><p><br/>The sky was gray in the middle of the afternoon as Jeno walked through the alley of the tallest trees, wrapped in his gray coat, the leaves on the branches regaining it's colours at the beginning of the spring. It's the exact familiar path he trailed each day for six years to go to school and to walk home from school with Renjun. But today was different. Today, he didn't have Renjun in tow when he asked if he could accompany him to their high school to collect the portfolios he'd left on his locker, Renjun refused, saying there is someone important he needs to see today, and tells Jeno to just meet him at the local playground if he wanted to grab lunch together.  </p><p> </p><p>The air is cold on a Friday morning, the tall grasses that surrounds the empty basketball court dances with each gust of the wind. It was nothing sort of lively. No children comes to the local playground, the recreational equipments are of rusted hinges and nails screaming for release. Nor the basketball court with the cracked flooring and moss that sits like hedgehog on the stone, the tarnished rings on both sides lacks nets and threatens to fall down any time. </p><p><br/>As Jeno walks through the stone path, he's met with two forms whose backs are turned against him. The one on the swing with gray jacket is familiar and unmistakably Renjun, on the other swing was a tall figure in brown hoodie Jeno supposes was the /someone/ Renjun said he would meet. Jeno can hear the two of them exchange words in low voices, at the same time Renjun looks back with the sound of his nearing footsteps. </p><p><br/>"Hey, Jen." Renjun got up from his swing to greet him with a poke on his side, taking Jeno's heavy backpack and placing it on the seat of the swing he just got up from. He's a little shorter than Jeno , but has taken responsibility to a new level, strong personality despite his tiny form and not too broad shoulders. A wonderful person, is what Jeno thinks Renjun is, full of spirit and confidence. Smart, and brave and can take control of any situation and make the best of it. </p><p><br/>"Hey." Jeno says back.</p><p><br/>The other guy also stood up, making little cracking noises from the swing. Jeno didn't look at him, for it was rude to look at someone you just met, but sees the guy took off his hoodie from the corner of his eyes.</p><p><br/>"By the way, Jeno." Renjun walks to his side, placing a hand on the small of his back and gestures to the guy in front of them. "It's Jaemin. He's my friend from grade school, if you remember, the one who's kind of odd and funny, but is an ace on English classes?"</p><p><br/>Renjun says it with such enthusiasm that had Jeno agreeing with an, "Oh.", even when he doesn't remember at all. Renjun had told him small or great details about his plenty of friends so Jeno wouldn't remember which of them is good in English, or Math, or Science or any subjects. He wouldn't remember which of Renjun's friend or grade school classmates forgot their homework and cried in class, which of them vandalised the classroom board with a permanent marker, drawing a male organ which their class adviser tried his hardest to cover with a sticker that he had to replace everyday because the naughty kids would peel it off when there's no teacher around. He doesn't remember it, too, if it was Renjun's fifth grade classmate or five year old neighboor friend who was brought to the hospital for swallowing bb gun pellets. </p><p><br/>"Hello." </p><p><br/>The guy says,voice too low that sends shivers down Jeno's spine, to which he didn't knew why at that time. Jeno looks at him finally, the guy looks a little sheepish, his thick brows creased a little but he doesn't look like he's frowning, probably embarrassed that Renjun had called him odd and funny. Jeno guesses the guy, <em>Jaemin</em>, is much more like him than Renjun. Shy and reserved, and anxious on meeting people for the first time. Jeno takes his hand, cold and soft and faintly shakes it and both of them pulled back at the same time.</p><p><br/>"It's nice meeting you, Jeno. I'm Na Jaemin." the guy continues, voice resonant and calmer this time. Jaemin smiled, lips tight and curved perfectly on one side. It knocked a breath out of Jeno's lungs, this time, finally understanding the restless beating in his chest.</p><p><br/>He was <em>attracted</em>, immensely drawn to a man he just met not a mere minute ago.</p><p><br/>That's how <em>it</em> all started. All the diverse emotions of admiration, want, pain and lust . All of the feelings he had harboured for someone named Na Jaemin.  </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>The second time Jeno met Jaemin was in Renjun's room. It was two days after their first meeting. That day, after their short introduction, Jaemin excuses himself saying he had errands to run. He gave Renjun a tight hug, so tight that Renjun groaned when his feet was lifted off of the ground and he pushes Jaemin that had the latter chuckling a little, the sound of it resonated in Jeno's chest. Thoughts of what if was like to be in Jaemin's arms, what is was like to be embraced by him flooded in Jeno's mind. Not curiousity but he <em>wants</em> it. Then, Jaemin turns to him, nodding and smiling with all his teeth that had etched in every corners of Jeno's brain and hadn't left since.</p><p> </p><p>Jeno didn't manage to smile back, too stunned on his feet, and watches as Jaemin run farther from them, Renjun shouting him instructions of which bus he should take in the background. Jeno didn't ask about him Jaemin despite all his curiosity and interests, afraid that Renjun might see through him.</p><p><br/>Jeno sits by the edge of Renjun's bed, fidgety hands holding the black slacks he borrowed from Renjun on graduation day. He should've returned it days ago, since he lives literally the next door to Renjun's house, but he didn't do laundry until yesterday. Too occupied with filling up forms, canvassing for reviewers to help him on college entrance exams, and unwelcomed thoughts about Na Jaemin who's sitting a feet across from him on the floor of Renjun's room, back resting on the side of the bed Jeno is sitting on. Jeno couldn't take his eyes off of him.</p><p> </p><p>He's faced with the back of Jaemin's head, his hair now a crazy shade of gray and blue, Jeno wonders what it smells like and how how soft it would feel if he combs his fingers through it. His long neck and nape exposed with the white shirt he's wearing. His shoulders look broader without the coat, Jeno wants to press his face against it. The muscle on his left arm visible by the way it was resting on top of his folded knee.</p><p><br/>Jaemin's head is tilted to the side. Jeno can tell from this angle that his mouth was stretched into a smile, eyes trained of what seemed like a video of cartoon he's watching in his phone. He ogles at him shameless, and wonders if Jaemin would find it absurd if he caught him staring. He didn't miss that of what seemed like a black marks on the back of Jaemin's ears close to  his nape. He squints at it, wonders if it was a wound or a scar or even a dirt.</p><p><br/>When Jaemin looks at him and turns the other side, Jeno figures it was a tattoo, a smiley face with eyes shaped like letter <em>x,</em> minimal and strange but pretty on Jaemin's skin. Jeno wonders what it meant, if it hurt when he had it, or who was the lucky artist that was able to touched him there.</p><p> </p><p>Jaemin turns to him, resting his elbows on the bed and looks up at Jeno with a smile with the same impact the way Jeno remembers it from the first day he'd met him. "He's in there for long minutes. He's gonna come out soon." Jaemin tells him, reassuring, and sends through every bones in Jeno's body. </p><p><br/>When Jeno found Jaemin inside Renjun's room when he came here, if it was one of those days Jeno hadn't been occupied of Jaemin's presence, he would've left the slacks on Renjun's desk  if he was in the shower like today. But Jaemin greeted him with a smile, had Jeno's face flushed that he remembered his name, and told him to wait for Renjun to come out of the bathroom. So Jeno did just that and it's weird how it was Jaemin who seemed like the one who is more cozy to be inside Renjun's room than Jeno is. If he thinks about it, it's been six years since Renjun moved to the house right beside Jeno, six years since Renjun and Jeno sit beside each other through middle school and highschool, and six years since Renjun's room felt like his own and vice versa and Renjun had never left since. Even if Renjun knows Jaemin since grade school, longer than he's known Jeno, Jeno is certain both of them had not seen each other for six years, even if they kept contact, there should still be an awkward distance between them even just a little and Jeno shouldn't be the one feeling like an outsider among the three of them. </p><p><br/>Jeno is cut out of his thoughts when the door to Renjun's room opens, revealing a shirtless Renjun with a towel wrapped up around his waist. He looks so unbothered, scratching the back of his wet hair with as he saunters in, not even batting an eyelash to anyone in the room.</p><p><br/>"Wait, Injunnie. I'm too dressed, I'm not ready ye--" Jaemin's deep voice booms inside the room, a dirty joke that caught Jeno off guard, and he makes a move to tug at the hem of his shirt, lifting it a little and Jeno didn't miss the way a small of Jaemin's stomach had been exposed for a split second. Wants to run his fingers along Jaemin's lean abs. </p><p><br/>Renjun threw the towel at Jaemin's direction, too fast the latter wasn't able to shield himself with his hands, Jeno likes the sound of his laugh. Contrary to what it seemed like, Renjun is wearing a basketball shorts underneath the towel. Jaemin is still laughing, too smugged of his own suggestive remark that had Renjun ticked off. It reminds Jeno of their high school friend Donghyuck who bursts into exaggerated laughter until Renjun gets ratty with his chaffs. Jeno somehow understands it. Renjun isn't as brilliant when he's pissy, but it's endearing somehow.</p><p><br/>"You got plans today?" Renjun asked Jaemin, who kept his gaze on Renjun's back while the other was putting a shirt on. Jeno wonders if he likes what he's seeing. </p><p><br/>"Not the ones I plan on doing." Jaemin quips without hesitation. He yawns, and Jeno watches him stretch his arms, his shirt rides up a bit and Jeno peers intently at the expanse skin that came to view, not caring about being caught, but it was gone in a second.</p><p><br/>"What about you, Jen?" </p><p><br/>Jeno startles, holding his breath as he turns away from Jaemin who looks at him. "Review." He says honestly.</p><p><br/>There's a pause before Renjun snorts a laugh. "First week to summer break and that's what you're going to do?" </p><p><br/>It's not the first time Renjun had jeered on his <em>habi</em>t, or should he call it responsibility. Jeno had always been strenuous with his studies, a top student ever since he started schooling, a clever child, his teachers call him. <em>Jeno, don't perfect the tests so our teachers could adjust the scores </em>his classmates would say, with or without weight, Jeno couldn't differentiate. But he wasn't pressured to do it, his mother is supportive and proud. His father was a scholar, never spent a single penny for tuition. His sister is an excellent student, awarded with a financial support for her education and on her last year on an exclusive college in Seoul. Jeno felt obliged to follow their steps, aiming for a scholarship in their city, not wanting to go far away from his parents and his cats. The neighbors say he's courteous, timid, smart- a <em>perfect</em> son. But Jeno knows he isn't. He is flawed, he is insecure, and he is <em>hollow</em>. Yet, he wasn't unhappy either.</p><p><br/>"You should  come, Jeno. It'll be my treat." There's a small slanted smile that appeared on Jaemin's face when he says this and Jeno already knows he can't say no.</p><p><br/>"Really?" Jeno finds himself asking, and watches Jaemin's eyes grow into something expectant like already knows the answer.</p><p><br/>When Jaemin stands on his feet to approach him, Jeno noticed a small dangling of light on Jaemin's right ear which he learns is a hoop of silver earring, the most part of it covered by the ends of his hair. "Of course." Jaemin says, placing a gentle hand on Jeno's right shoulder that left before it burns. "You're Renjun's friend," he beams at him, a pleasant smile. "So that means you're my friend too!" </p><p>
  <br/>
  <em>Oh, to be your friend.</em>
</p><p><br/>"When did mine became yours, Jaemin?" Renjun muses, tone incredulous. Then he sends Jeno a once over. "Are you going to change?" He asked.</p><p><br/>Jeno's wearing the pullover he wore last night to sleep, and a cargo shorts he puts on every time his mother asked him to go to the groceries. It wasn't a bad outfit per se. But with Jaemin sporting a short sleeved buttoned up shirt and faded blue jeans, he feels so underdressed. Renjun, too, is wearing  a tight fitted shirt and black jeans.</p><p> </p><p>"I should." Jeno says.</p><p><br/>"Right, I'll wait for you downstairs."</p><p><br/>Jeno stands up from the bed, and finds himself smiling back at Jaemin who waves at him, nose scrunched, and eyes twinkling. </p><p> </p><p><br/>When on normal days he'd wear a hoodie and sweat pants, Jeno changed to a band retro shirt and black skinny jeans that's ripped a little on the upper knee. To look good and feel good about himself, to impress Jaemin. But tried to hide his blush when Jaemin comments, "Nice shirt. I like Pink Floyd too.", before Jaemin hopped on his own motorcycle and drives away like he knows where they're going. </p><p> </p><p>It became a race on the lonely road that hadn't heard laughter for awhile, and Jeno warries whenever there's a cracked concrete on their lane, crutching tightly on Renjun's stomach, afraid to fall. They play since they don't have to worry of any vehicles ahead. The avenue had always been empty, except for the scheduled bus or two that passes in the morning or after class hours on the weekdays, or the bicycles that pedalled slowly to the scarred street. The only busy lane in their town is the main road, blocks away from their district. The people in their neighborhood doesn't risk to drive their cars on the aged roadway, with potholes that could flatten the tires, opting to use pedalled or electric bikes when going back and forth to convenient stores.  </p><p><br/>"Are you and Jaemin..?" Jeno asked from behind his neck, index finger vaguely gesturing back and forth from Renjun and Jaemin's direction. </p><p><br/>"Hey!" Renjun spats at him. "Jaemin asked the same thing, you and me. You're too smart, Jeno. There's no way your brains have the same wavelength?" </p><p><br/>"He what?" Jeno frowns at him. More focused on the matter than the insult.</p><p><br/>"Asked if you were my boyfriend." Renjun says, turning his bike to the right to avoid a lump on the road. Jeno can't imagine that and maybe Renjun had seen the confusion on his face through the rearview mirror.</p><p><br/>Renjun laughed. "Batshit crazy, right? Besides, you know that I like--" He was cut off by Jaemin's funny laugh, overtaking them. Renjun yells at him from the top of his lungs, making Jeno's ears hurt and speed up. </p><p> </p><p>If Jeno had learned something about Jaemin that day is that Jaemin was confident, didn't ask them to assist him to order when it's the two of them who's familiar with the place. He was friendly, too, speaks to Jeno like they know each other for a long time.</p><p> </p><p>From their table, Jeno watches him order their drinks, leaning his elbows on the counter coolly and flashing a charming smile at the lady on the counter, Jeno can see her blushing from three feet away. He paid their orders, like he promised. Jeno thanked him for the Kitkat shake, Renjun complains the avocado shake tastes too bland, and the smell of Jaemin's coffee is too strong Jeno wonders how bad it must taste. </p><p> </p><p>Jeno learned that Jaemin came from Seoul and moved with his parents blocks away from their neighborhood on a tiny rent apartment. It was an abrupt decision, and they moved immediately after his mother, a dentist, finally found a small lot on the main city to open her clinic. It was still under renovation, Jaemin said.</p><p> </p><p>Renjun said Jaemin is rich, that his family has plenty of business investments in Seoul, Jeno thinks he is, too, from the way Jaemin dresses and how upright he walks and talks, but Jaemin denies it and said he lives a simple life like the others. He was supposed to be a varsity player on basketball on a college in Seoul. It's the same college his sister goes, but Jeno doesn't say, just listening to him intently. His college application was scrapped when Jaemin was discovered to have herniated disc and the school didn't let him play anymore. Jeno wonders why they had to move this far when there's plenty of universities in Seoul yet he didn't ask why. </p><p><br/>"Are you sure about this? This isn't the life you get used to living, though. This place might bore you." Renjun asks. The question induces an unsettling look in Jaemin's eyes that was gone in a blink.</p><p><br/>"But you're here." Jaemin answers, a trail of conviction in his voice, then he looks at Jeno. "And Jeno's here. He seems like a good company." </p><p><br/>It stirred a faint blush on Jeno's cheeks, eyes wide as he stared back at Jaemin who raised a brow at him and it's the most attractive of him Jeno had ever seen. </p><p><br/>"God." Renjun laments, stuffing the last piece of macaroon in his mouth. "Guess it's too early to burst your bubble, but, fine, you can say that."</p><p><br/>Jeno is aware that he was dull, unlike the kids his age who makes the most out of their teenage years, unlike Renjun who says and do what he wants. Renjun always complains that he was boring, but Jeno knows he doesn't mean it. Because if he does, he wouldn't be ringing Jeno's phone like alarm clock every morning to tell him to wait for him to finish showering so they can walk to school together. He wouldn't be waiting at the door of Jeno's classroom on breaks so they could eat lunch together despite being on different classes. He wouldn't risk climbing on that one protruded brick that separates the balcony from his and Jeno's room and bangs on his window in the middle of the night just to show him a funny meme he's found on the internet when he could just send it to text. <em>You never replied, Jeno. You never even read my texts</em>. Renjun told him once and right he doesn't. He prefers phone calls over texts.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>Jaemin is amiable. When without hesitation, he approached an old couple at the cafe to exchange a friendly small talk with them and  to coo at the samoyed dog they brought along. Jeno wants to pet the white ball of sunshine too, but he's too embarassed to do it, thinks he's better than Jaemin at resisting emotions when it comes to cute things. Then Renjun tells him, "Don't mind him. He's really close to his grandparents. Been like that ever since we were kids." </p><p> </p><p>Jeno's chest glows with something warm, watching Jaemin in adoration as he talks dearly to the couple like he knew them fir a long time, and as Jaemin makes his way back on their table with a blinding smile on his face.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It's the same kind of endearment he'd seen of Jaemin, when the next day, Jeno's seated by the deck of their balcony, his back resting uncomfortably on the balister, trying to figure out how an engineer should design an airport runway if the planes took off at it's lowest acceleration rate with a sketch pad and pen in hand. His head snaps at the sound of an engine that went off nearby, heart tripping a little when he saw Jaemin climbing down his motorcycle. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jeno hopes he'd go unnoticed, watching Jaemin with his hair swept up by the wind, forehead exposed and sunglasses falling low on the bridge of his nose. His skin looks remarkably gorgeous bathed in sunlight, everglowing with his bright yellow shirt. The frown on his face quickly turns into something surprise and he strides forward with open arms. Jeno followed his gaze in curiosity and sees Renjun's older cousins coming out their front door. Jeno stills in his seat, watching as they hug and talk but he couldn't hear. Then they hug again, a little longer this time and something inside Jeno's chest stirs, a tinge of jealousy, maybe and tries to shake it off before his brain could process it. Jaemin is probably close to Renjun's cousins too.</p><p> </p><p>Jeno startles at the sound of someone clearing their throat and his head snaps to find Renjun leaning on the racks of his home's patio, too close to theirs that they can grab each other if they want to. He's got a faint smirk on his face that Jeno knows where it's coming from. Renjun's younger cousin, Yizhuo, may or may not be crushing on Jeno and Renjun likes to make fun of him about it. Teases him for the heck of it that Jeno wonders if he would actually throw hands if Jeno would actually make a move on her. Perhaps he wouldn't. He wouldn't make a move on her at all.</p><p> </p><p>"They brought cakes and ice cream." Renjun brags. "Was gonna call you over but your mom said you haven't gotten out your room since morning."</p><p> </p><p>Jeno nods, closing his pad. He can worry about planes and acceleration later. It's easier to study at night anyway. He stands and dust off the wrinkles on the back of his shirt.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"Anyway," Renjun says. They both look down to where Renjun's cousins are still talking to Jaemin. "Why are you still looking? D-don't tell me you're oggling my sisters? Hey, I'm gonna kill you."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"O-of course not!" Jeno says quick, defensive. Exactly how Jeno imagined him.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Renjun cackles openly at his embarassed face. "Or could it be..." He looks at Jeno, then back to his cousins, then to Jeno again. "Jae--"</p><p> </p><p>"Hey"</p><p> </p><p>Jaemin.</p><p> </p><p>Jaemin's voice boomed from below, waving his hands eagerly in their direction. Renjun's cousins might've noticed them too and starts waving at him and Renjun before they climb up their car. </p><p> </p><p>"Hey. Come over for a bit if it's okay. There's leftover. You can eat with Jaemin in my room." Renjun offers. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jeno finds no reason to decline to free food. Or maybe he better had declined since his throat still hurts from the meringue he devoured last nights and ice cream and sweets wouldn't do him any better. But then there's Jaemin.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Later Jeno finds himself slumped down on the tiny rounded couch inside Renjun's room, a cup of ice cream in hand, it's so good that he doesn't even feel bad about his throat anymore. Jaemin is stretched out in Renjun's bed like he owns it, still sulky that he only gets to eat the caramel cake and not the ice cream because it's strawberry flavored. Jeno supposes he either hates it or he's allergic to it. Renjun is laughing delightedly at his dismay, some droplets of ice cream falls from his mouth to the bed and Jaemin winces like he owns it. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"You were late. They wanted to play AOV but we needed one more player." Renjun told him, getting up from the bed to his desk chair. He grabbed a tissue from a small box on his desk and wiped the cream from his covers. "I mean, when were you not late, though?"</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jaemin snorts and almost choked on his cake but he recovers quick, placing it on the desk. "Who knows? We can still play, though. Jeno, do you play games?"</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jeno tensed at the attention when Jaemin turns to him. A pleasant smile on his face, so friendly and so handsome. Jeno straightens his back and begins asking himself why he had to be this conscious around Jaemin. Sure he does get nervous talking to people he doesn't know well, but with Jaemin, it's to an intensity that isn't to easy to bear. He nods nervously and before he can answer, Renjun beats him to it. "He doesn't sleep on weekends."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"I do- that's not- I sleep."  </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>There's an erratic stutter in his heart when he hears the giddy laugh Jaemin lets out. Breathless by the moment Jaemin recovers and locks eyes with him. "I'm sorry. It's just. You were cute." </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>A faint blush crept up on Jeno's cheek, ears hot, and when he glances at Renjun's direction he's relieved the other was too occupied fixing his bedsheet to focus on their conversation in case Renjun would give him shit for blushing at something his friend had said to Jeno.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jaemin's still looking at him, eyes glinted with mirth like he's waiting for Jeno to say something or if he was checking if his laugh had offended him. He wasn't. In fact, he was swayed.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Later that day Jeno finds himself inside the central mall. It's huge. Not something you would expect from a small and isolated city. Often times Renjun would take him there to play arcade or have expensive coffees. Something adults do, a coffee break from studies, they call it, even when they both know they only go there for the cakes. It's only really crowded on Holidays but not as crowded as what the malls on the big cities are. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They ate at the food court. Tried the claw machines lined up on the mall aisle. Renjun didn't want to try the machines, saying it's a waste of money but before he can even finish his sentence Jaemin lets out a whine of surprise and Jeno stares wide eyes at the claw on his machine wobbly holding a tiny red box, it's ribbon barely hanging on one of the claws' teeth. Jeno holds his breath too, nervous, and sighed in amusement when the box was dropped onto the hole. </p><p> </p><p>Jaemin lets out another victorious chuckle as he takes the box from the small door on the bottom of the machine. </p><p> </p><p>"Woah! What's in it!" Renjun gasped and dashed to where Jaemin is. </p><p> </p><p>Quickly, Jaemin retracts his hand, hid the box behind him. Renjun tried to grab it with both hands, arms caged around Jaemin. It looks like he was hugging him. Jeno wonders what's it like to hug Jaemin. If he'll be warm because of his ridiculously huge fur coat, or if he would feel frail and bony wrapped in Jeno's arms, or if he'll feel hard and strong because Jeno doesn't have to see his chest to know how broad it is. When a wave of unwelcome thought passes his head for a second, how Jaemin would smell up close, he snapped out of it, embarrassed of his own thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>Renjun is still fighting for it, the kind of person that he is but this time Jaemin is holding the box above his head, out of Renjun's reach. Renjun wasn't trying to jump to grab it, though, probably not wanting Jaemin to make fun of him even more and Jeno startled when Renjun pulled him on the arm. </p><p> </p><p>"Jeno get that from him. I wanna see!"</p><p> </p><p>"W--what?" Jeno was gonna say something along the lines of Renjun calling the claw machines shit 3 minutes ago but now he couldn't contain his curiosity to know what's in the prize box. Also, he's crazy for thinking Jeno could just randomly jump at Jaemin to take that box. They're not that close.</p><p> </p><p>"Just do it!"</p><p> </p><p>"W--why?"</p><p> </p><p>Before Jeno could even protest, Jaemin was chuckling and walking towards them, holding out the box for him. Jeno blinks for a second and takes the box but Renjun was grabbing it in a second and watches Renjun opened it. It's a keyring of a pink bunny, a small carrot on top of it's head, thick brows slightly knitted and two big teeth showing. </p><p> </p><p>"What the hell. That's nonsense." Renjun hisses and shoves it back on Jeno's hand. "You can get three of that for a thousand won."</p><p> </p><p>Jeno stares at his hand and faces Jaemin who's smiling brightly and Renjun's defeat. He extends his hands to give it to him and Jaemin takes the box and stuffed it on the huge pocket of his coat. The keyring is on Jeno's palm when Jaemin holds him on the wrist and looks at it, like he was trying to see what it was. </p><p> </p><p>"Do you want to keep it?" Jaemin asked.</p><p> </p><p>"But it's.. it's yours."</p><p> </p><p>Despite the coldness inside the mall, Jaemin's hand was warm when he held the back of Jeno's and closed his palm in it. "Doesn't it reminds you of me?" Jaemin leans in a little, frowning a little and showing his teeth, imitating the image on the keyring. It does look like him. With his thick brows and his big teeth, specially. </p><p> </p><p>It was funny and Jeno smiled, probably the response Jaemin was waiting for and he pulled away, Jeno calming a little and they followed Renjun who kept walking now on the other lane. It felt nice to that close to Jaemin, yet too stupid to be drawn on a guy he just met. Jeno wishes it doesn't get worse than this.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>They window-shop for awhile until Jaemin was pulling both of them to an escape room right beside a waffle restaurant. "Escape Room", it reads, written in white and blue thin letters on a black LED screen. The last time Jeno went to the mall with Renjun it was still under construction. Jeno had never been to an escape room and he guesses Renjun too, from the way he was eyeing the entrance where what seemed like a group of friends are making their exit. Wide eyes, big amused smiles still flustered on their faces and one lady in a blue dress still her hands clasped on her chest like she was nervous .</p><p> </p><p>When he looks at Jaemin's direction, he had stepped forward to the entrance, frowning as he scans on the wooden post board. </p><p> </p><p>"Hey, let's try this one." Jaemin says coolly and looks at them with expectant eyes.</p><p> </p><p>"No way. That's scary." </p><p> </p><p>"Come on, it should be fun. What do you think, Jeno?" Jaemin turns to him, expectant.</p><p> </p><p>Jeno considers it for a bit. Although he'd often see escape room scenes from the movies or dramas, not detailed enough to know what it's like to actually be the one escaping the room. Somehow it seemed terrifying, yet interesting, and Jaemin is looking at him with those eyes, waiting. </p><p> </p><p>"It should be fun, I guess. I've never been to one." Jeno says and Renjun is looking at him like he grew another head. </p><p> </p><p>"Count me out, then." Renjun says with finality. </p><p> </p><p>"Wait for us here." Jaemin tells him, and he was grabbing Jeno's arm rightaway as they walk in to the entrance. Like he isn't even considering that Renjun could change his mind and decide to go with them. Or could it be that he knows Renjun too well and knows a final decision just by the sound of it. It's not a competition, but somehow Jeno couldn't help but feel sad to think that Jaemin knows Renjun more than Jeno ever will.</p><p> </p><p>The guy at the counter looks rather bored, sleepy, when he discussed them some rules: Don't try to kick the walls or the doors, don't break anything, and there's CCTV don't do anything weird. "By-by the way I'm Sungchan. Welcome to..uh.. Escape Room." The guy smiles, sheepish, and Jeno figures he wasn't bored but rather shy. Somehow, it reminds Jeno of himself. </p><p> </p><p>"Is this your first job?" Jaemin asked him with a rather friendly smile. </p><p> </p><p>"Do-does it show so much? I'm sorry, please, don't report me to the manager I..I mean it's not like he's.. he's not here." The counter guy, Sungchan, staggers and looks at Jaemin in horror. </p><p> </p><p>"Hey, no, it's fine." Jaemin coos. He leans in the counter and ruffles the guy's hair who coils, flustered. "You'll get used to it. Just smile."</p><p> </p><p>"O..okay. Thank you. Leave your phones on the locker. You have an hour." </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It was endearing the way Jaemin would effortlessly charms his way into people's heart. Like he did on Jeno's and now there's a constant warm feeling on his chest just by seeing him. It's only when Jaemin taps him on the back when Jeno realised that he was staring. He blinks, embarrassed, and followed Sungchan inside the black curtain where he helps them with the blind fold and leads them inside. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>There was an ambulance like sound, a signal for them that the game had begun and an electric voice echoed on the walls telling them to remove their blind folds. Jeno had to blink and scratch his eyes to finally figured out that it was indeed too dark of a room. Everything is black, too quiet, but he hears a small shuffling.</p><p> </p><p>"Jeno?" </p><p> </p><p>Jeno heard Jaemin, not too close yet not too far. The counter guy, Sungchan, already told them that they'll be separated at the beginning and leads them to their own stations. He reaches out in the darkness and there's none. He spins, holding out his hands and there's none.</p><p> </p><p>"Jaemin?"</p><p> </p><p>"Jeno, where are you?"" </p><p> </p><p>"I'm here." Jeno says and he realised how it didn't made any sense.</p><p> </p><p>"Oh." Jaemin sounded rather confused and Jeno bit his lip. "Alright, alright. Don't move, I'll get there."</p><p> </p><p>Jeno nods and feels stupid in an instant. As if Jaemin could see that. "Okay."</p><p> </p><p>"Can you talk again so I could follow your voice?" Jaemin says and Jeno finally hears his footsteps.</p><p> </p><p>"What do I say?" Jeno wants to know.</p><p> </p><p>"Anything." He answers.</p><p> </p><p>"Anything?"</p><p> </p><p>"Anything." Jaemin chuckled despite, his step is getting closer. </p><p> </p><p>"I'm sorry." He mutters, embarrassed.</p><p> </p><p>There's a light tap of fingers on his back and he feels Jaemin hand makes it way to his elbow, Jaemin's forearms warm on Jeno's back when he whispers. "Got ya."</p><p> </p><p>Jaemin guides him as they shuffle around in small steps occasionally bumping onto thin walls and knobs until he hears a flicker and a bright yellow light right above their heads had went on. When his eyes adjusted to the brightness, he'd noticed that Jaemin's hands is hovering on a switch on the wall. </p><p> </p><p>When he looks around, the place is empty except for the six cubicles facing each other. Jeno guesses he's in one of those rooms before Jaemin finds him. </p><p> </p><p>They looked in through the each cubicles, three boxes parallel to each other and on the second door to the left, Jaemin stopped on his tracks, hands still bracing Jeno's elbow. "I think the door's here."</p><p> </p><p>It was but a flat surface, same color as every walls in the cubicle. Jaemin shifts behind him and Jeno can feel his warmth on his back when he leans in and slightly pushed at the wall which makes a little clicking sound. "It's here." </p><p> </p><p>Jeno nods, cheeks probably flushed with how close their bodies are and thank God it was too dark for Jaemin to notice. </p><p> </p><p>"Should I go first? There's probably some scare behind the door."</p><p> </p><p>"Sure." Jeno bit his bottom lip. "How did you.. how did you know your way?" </p><p> </p><p>Jaemin turns them around, suddenly missing his warmth on his back. He's now behind Jaemin and it didn't help the flush on his face when Jaemin reaches behind to grab one of Jeno's wrist, keeping him close. A few hard push and the door swings open, revealing a room that is barely lit up by the small bulb from the ceiling. </p><p> </p><p>"They had it mapped on the bulletin outside." Jaemin says after awhile. So that's what he was looking at earlier. There was no scare other than what look like a huge snake lying on floor. "It's more spacious than I thought, though "</p><p> </p><p>Looking around, Jeno's first impression was an abandoned hospital warehouse he'd seen on the movies. The floor seemed intentionally dusty, webs of spiders dangling everywhere to give it an eerie look and creepy jars with fake body parts are lined on the shelves with mysterious boxes. Jeno thinks this rather look like a horror house than an escape room.</p><p> </p><p>The first thing that caught their attention was the pieces of puzzle scattered on a desk on one side of the room, lit up by a desk lamp. Jaemin pulled him by the wrist, touch soft and careful. </p><p> </p><p>He offered to solve it and instantly regrets it the moment Jaemin let go of his wrist, already missing the touch. But Jaemin stood behind hin too close, the warmth of his chest is pressed against Jeno's back. Heat rising in his cheeks when he felt one of Jaemin's hand held him still on the hip. When Jaemin rested his chin on Jeno's shoulder, peeking on what he's doing, Jeno knows he had to finish the puzzle fast and despite the drumming in his chest he was able to do it on a heart beat. </p><p> </p><p>The completed puzzle was of a box and a key as their first clue.</p><p> </p><p> "Guess we'll end up finding keys on the boxes after all." Jaemin says with a hearty laugh.</p><p> </p><p>Contrary to what he thought, Jaemin's strong palm never leaves his waist, occasionally tapping and sliding down his hip, making Jeno crazy. Not when they moved to the shelves with the chests, Jeno solving word puzzles, impressing Jaemin.</p><p> </p><p>"You're so smart." Jaemin says when Jeno answered a riddle without having to search for a clue. He ignores it, Jaemin's hand on his waist burning up when he tells Jeno that he's afraid of spiders coming out of the chests and asks Jeno to open it with the keys and they both flinch at the Jack-in-the-box. The laughter of the clown too loud, too spooky and Jeno can't tell if the erratic beating of his chest was from the scare or from their proximity, Jaemin's warmth on his back. Jeno finds it not to care anymore where his nervousness comes from because the more chest they open, surprising scares like a moving tongue and a moving lizard tail, Jeno will never be able to tell.</p><p> </p><p>They head to another room after unlocking the passcode of the door. The first thing Jeno noticed was the red LED on the wall across them that says 25:36, as it continues to count down reminding them of the timer. The other room didn't have the timer and Jeno wonders if it was intentional or that if the LED there had a malfunction. </p><p> </p><p> The room this time is completely different than the other one, from an abandoned hospital warehouse to what looks like a shop filled with dolls in dresses and expensive looking red furnitures, bright chandelier on the ceiling. There are three mannequins seated on the cushion half his size, they're in red, green and blue dresses, their eyes were tied with red ribbons and Jeno couldn't help but feel terrified with just the thought of them moving, or what if one of them starts to speak, or turn their heads and look at them. </p><p> </p><p>"God, I don't like what I'm seeing." Jeno thinks out loud. </p><p> </p><p>It's not that he's afraid of dolls, actually finds them pretty, but it's different when you're in a room with hundreds of them threatening to do the unthinkable. </p><p> </p><p>"You're scared?" Jaemin whispers behind him, his voice lower than it usually is that Jeno felt at the back of his neck. "You can sit there and wait while I try to find the clues."</p><p> </p><p>Jeno follows to where he's pointing. A giant sized black teddy bear slumped on the wall, the joints are stitched like rug, no eyes and it's jaw is open wide with what looks like real teeth sewn there, it's tongue poking out and was it a red liquid Jeno's seeing. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>When Jeno looks up at him, honestly the proximity shouldn't surprised him at all since they're stuck like glue from the beginning, already aware that Jaemin was gorgeous, but is he really this stunning up close? He quickly looks away, or so he thinks as quickly as he can that is probably more than 10 seconds of staring at Jaemin's handsome face. He elbows him on the chest, enough to make a point but not enough to hurt and Jaemin chuckles, the sound vibrating on Jeno's shoulder blade. </p><p> </p><p>"I'm sorry." Jaemin says. There's still a hint of laugh in his voice but he sounded sincere when he said, "I didn't mean that. I won't scare you again." </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>It took them 10 minutes to find the first clue, only to find a letter on one ear of the giant bear. After that, Jaemin does all the work as they searched through the dolls on the shelves, turning the wind up keys, some of the doll speaking numbers, crying and when one of the dolls laugh so loud it echoed in the room, they both jumped back, terrified but laugh despite themselves. </p><p> </p><p>"Still think this is a good idea?" Jeno asks once they set all their clues on the desk. </p><p> </p><p>Jaemin hummed, says so casually, "Of course. I get to spend it with you."</p><p> </p><p>Perhaps it wasn't even a flirty remark, something Jaemin would say to anyone he's with in an Escape Room even if it wasn't Jeno because he knows Jaemin to always have a way with his words in a few days of knowing him. Yet Jeno flushes anyway and is glad Jaemin had his eyes focused on the clues on the desks. </p><p> </p><p>"I think I got it." Jaemin announces after a few minutes and glances at the timer. There's no air in his words, no ego, just a reassurance that he can get Jeno out of here in no time. "Do you wanna stay a bit? We still have 14 minutes."</p><p> </p><p>Jeno wonders why he'd offer that. "Renjun's waiting outside."</p><p> </p><p>"Of course." Was Jaemin's humourless laugh. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Remembering that they left their phones on the entrance locker, Jeno wonders where he is. It's almost an hour since they entered the Escape Room. He doubts Renjun would ditch them. He'd never done that to Jeno, and he wonders if it would be different with Jaemin around. Jeno tries to ignore it, that somewhere at the back of his head he wishes Renjun had ditched them so he can have more alone time with Jaemin. </p><p> </p><p>"Renjun told me he has a friend here who's really smart." Jaemin says quietly. "But he didn't say you'll be this cute."</p><p> </p><p>Startled, Jeno looks at Jaemin and their eyes met. He's certain the blush on his cheeks is now apparent under the chandelier on top of their heads. Jaemin isn't smiling, nor is there a mirth in his eyes to imply that he was joking, but he looks at Jeno hopeful like he's waiting for him to say something. </p><p> </p><p>"I--I'm not," Jeno stutters. He'd never been flirted like this before. Although he'd received a few confessions and praises here and there, at school, at the arcade, at the groceries, situations he can easily and politely turn down or brush off. But now, Jaemin is waiting for his reaction. </p><p> </p><p>A smile breaks across Jaemin's face. "He said you're really shy too." </p><p> </p><p>Perhaps he is, but overcomming his shyness is something he had learn to manage over the years. Obvious not in front of Jaemin. Jeno bit his bottom lip and breaks eye contact. He wonders if Jaemin is like this to everyone. He'd seen him clingy to Renjun, embracing and lifting the smaller every chance he gets before he breaks into a smile or laughter like he gets energy from people's warmth and affection. Jaemin grabbing his wrist and holding his waist earlier was a part of himself, so Jeno really shouldn't be surprise to it. Jeno had heard Jaemin call the young ladies behind the counter pretty, had told the aunties on the vendors that they have lovely smile, had approached an old couple on the coffee shop and talks with them with full adoration in his eyes, and had cheer up a cashier boy of an Escape Room who's too nervous for his first job. </p><p> </p><p>All of these flatteries, touches and smiles are a part of Jaemin so Jeno shouldn't feel anything special at all. But the problem is, he wants to feel special when he shouldn't be.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>When they got out and Sungchan hands them their phones saying some players could finish it in less than 30 minutes and comments on how they're so bad at it before he caught himself, Jaemin pinches him on the cheeks, Sungchan despite his taller physique looks too small in Jaemin's arms and thanked them for trying the Escape Room. </p><p> </p><p>Renjun is waiting by the entrance, arms crossed in his chest, he looks chic and intimidating as always, hissing at them like a cat which reminds Jeno that one time his cat Nal got angry at him for taking her treats. </p><p> </p><p>Jeno wondered what he was up to the whole time.</p><p> </p><p>"Wow, really? An hour? What did you do in there?" Renjun scowls at them. </p><p> </p><p>Would Renjun find that Jaemin had his hand on Jeno's waist the whole time they were inside the Escape Room? Jeno doesn't know why he's worried about this or why the thinks it should be a secret to begin with. Jaemin will probably hold Renjun's waist too if it were the two of them to enter the Escape Room.</p><p> </p><p>When Jaemin trapped Renjun in his arms, threatening that the Escape Room was scary and he'll lift him till they're inside, the smaller boy struggling in his hold, that's when Jeno realizes he needs to snap out of it. </p><p> </p><p>Jaemin doesn't smile at him, he smiles at everyone. Jaemin doesn't look at him, he looks at everyone. Jaemin doesn't hold him, he holds everyone. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>After dinner, Jeno offers to wash the plates but Seungwan insisted to help him. Drying the plates with the washing clothe and arranging them in the drawers. It's the fourth year since his sister started the university and moved at a small apartment in Seoul. It's always been easier like this, with his sister around, they watch movies, they cook, they bake and ride their bikes, they chat. Jeno's favorite part is when his sister will come home for breaks and Jeno will come to her room at night as she tells him stories about her friends and studies in her college. </p><p> </p><p>"Are you worried for college? Mom told me to cheer you up." Seungwan smiled at him. She really resembles their mother a lot, fair skin, curly hair and voice too gentle. </p><p> </p><p>"A bit." Jeno admits. The results of the entrance exams he took on the nearby city universities should be release soon, although he already made it on his target uni. "Is it really not tiring to go from Seoul to here for your studies?"</p><p> </p><p>Jeno always asks him this. Worried how hard it must be for a girl who grew up in a small town like Seungwan to suddenly move out and face a big city on her own.  </p><p> </p><p>"Got used to it." She quips, like she always does. "Jeno, you took the entrance exams for Seoul universities, didn't you? If you passed any of them, which I'm sure you would, please do consider them. I know you're already smart, and it's a different lifestyle there, you're going to grow more. By your own, you're gonna learn to practice housekeeping, manage your budget and find your way around on a new place and new environment. You're gonna be more independent and there will be homesick or stress but--" </p><p> </p><p>"Noona... You're not making it sound so promising."</p><p> </p><p>Seungwan chuckles, wiping her hands with the clothe on the fridge. "I'm just saying you're gonna meet a lot of people, kind enough to be your friends and make you feel like a family."</p><p> </p><p>Like Renjun, Jeno doesn't say. Sure he'd want to meet new people, but Renjun wouldn't be there and it doesn't feel right.</p><p> </p><p>"Not pressuring you, of course." Seungwan, although shorter, reaches up to pat him on the head and smiles at him like she already knows what he was thinking. "I know you already made a promise to go to the uni with Renjun at the central. </p><p> </p><p>Before graduating, Jeno already sealed a guaranteed 20% discount on tuition fee at the Central University Renjun and him decides to go, for ranking second on top of his classes. Renjun had aced his application on applied arts and soon before the school year starts, the university will be holding a camp for outstanding arts freshmen students to train them. Jeno's never been more than happy for his bestfriend, assuring Renjun that he need not to be nervous because he's as good as the others and most probably better than them. The results for written entrance examinations has yet been released and Jeno was hoping he had aced it for e better scholarship endorsement.</p><p> </p><p>Much like his sister, Jeno's mother had always been supportive of his decisions, was excited for Jeno to go to the central university more than Jeno himself, is present whenever Jeno competes on competitions, will hug and congratulate him, win or lose </p><p> </p><p>His father didn't say a thing. He didn't say anything when Jeno informed them that he'd like to take his engineering degree on the central university, didn't say anything two years ago when Jeno rejected the exchange student programme. He never really interfered with Jeno's decisions and whether it was trust or negligence, Jeno can't tell. Although he'd congratulate Jeno in his competitions and awards, he was never in any of them. </p><p> </p><p>For once, Jeno had set aside the drive of always trying to impress his father, despite knowing that his father would rather have him go into prestigious universities in big cities like his sister. Which is pretty much out of his comfort zone, an overwhelming change, and Jeno doesn't know if he can do that. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>That night, when Jeno when under the covers and alone in the confines of his bed, he thinks of Jaemin. Tries not to think of him, yet that's what he ends up doing. He thinks of Jaemin's long fingers pressing on his hip sliding up his waist to the last bone of his ribcage. Thinks of the warmth of Jaemin's chest on his back and the instance when his breath ghosted Jeno's neck when he leaned in a whisper. Those touches were never the same with Renjun. His bestfriend couldn't make his heart race the way Jaemin do. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Jeno thought it was a simple crush, probably a normal impression upon meeting the handsome Na Jaemin for the first time. It's stronger nowㅡ the erratic beating of his chest when Jaemin is around, the butterflies wild in stomach heavy. It felt too wrong and Jeno know he needs to put his feelings in a box and hide it under his bed before it gets worst. </p><p> </p><p>Jeno had never like anyone so much as thinking about them before going to bed. It's a dangerous territory he'd never imagine he'd step his foot on, upon setting his eyes on a Na Jaemin, so gorgeous, it's unreal. It's too naive of him to even think that he has a chance and that he was special to Jaemin in any way. He shouldn't delude himself too much into thinking that Jaemin can see him the way Jeno sees him.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Perhaps Jeno should avoid him. It's not always necessary that he agrees to go wherever Renjun asks him to, anyway, be it with Jaemin or without. He can always refuse and reason out that he didn't feel like going out or that he had stuffs to do with his sister at home, the latter most likely the best excuse. Avoiding Jaemin should be easy. Even if they go to the same uni, it's less likely for their schedules to meet having different majors and with Jaemin's friendly nature he'll be able to cope well and find friends on his own. Although he'd surely occasionally still hang out with Renjun, and with Renjun means with Jeno too, at least, he can avoid him for now. It shouldn't be more than infatuation the way Jeno sees him, a new person, that's what he is to Jeno. </p><p> </p><p>Which exactly what didn't happened the next day. Jeno's by the patio at the front of his door watering the succulents and cacti lined up on the railing, warily sprinkling from his watering can and careful not to pour enough only until bits of water comes out from the saucer. Renjun, seated by a tiny stool on the decking across got tired of watching him and busies himself looking at the desk lamps available on Naver Shop occasionally showing them to Jeno asking if it looks okay. They all have lights and colors so Jeno can't really tell the difference and just nods at whatever Renjun says. </p><p> </p><p>Jeno hears an engine stopping and his ears lit up at the familiarity, how he already knows without even looking that it was Jaemin, climbing down his motorbike. Jaemin's clad in dark fitted jeans and a white shirt underneath a denim jacket. If he dresses up in expensive clothes or the way he dressed the clothes that makes it look expensive, Jeno can't tell. When he took off his helmet, what Jeno expected what a faded shade of gray hair is now the intense color of black. It's a better look on his skin, Jeno can tell even from afar. </p><p> </p><p>He watches Jaemin cross the widened road. Jeno figures Jaemin hasn't seem they yet as he gazes on the further houses to his left, so Jeno stares at him freely. Jeno admired his confidence, not the annoying ego but the way he carries himself so lightly and without worrries. He's like an eternal summer, a bright sun in the perfect blue skies. </p><p> </p><p>When Renjun noticed his arrival, he calls him and Jaemin makes his way to the patio with his lazy walk and a gorgeous smile. There's a slight frown on his face when he climbs up the deck, right hand up to his mouth, biting the nails off his pinky finger. Jeno watches without shame, makes him want to feel how Jaemin's lips will move in kiss, or how his veiny hands would feel around his body. The way Renjun spoke so loud to greet him feels like a warning to shake him out of it and Jeno finally manages to look away, back to the cactus that is half drowning on it's pot. Jeno panics, quickly picks it up with the intention to remove the water from it but his fingers land on the small of it's body.</p><p> </p><p>It pricked on his thumb and Jeno quickly retreats his hand, quiet enough to not make a sound and none of his companion would notice yet before he can even look at his thumb there's a cold hand that's wrapped around his wrist. Jaemin had pulled him not enough to hurt but enough to make him turn his way. Jeno's eyes battle whether he should look at his finger or Jaemin's face. The latter seemed like a better idea, to watch Jaemin's thick handsome brows furrow in concern and he only snapped out of it when Jaemin presses at his thumb, squeezing the blood out of it and Jaemin's hands feels perfect on his own. </p><p> </p><p>"Oh no. It's bleeding!" Renjun says dramatically. Suddenly, Jeno is reminded of the time in art class when he had a paper cut and Renjun panicked that he offered to give Jeno a piggyback ride to the nurse office. </p><p> </p><p>"It's fi--"</p><p> </p><p>"It's still in there." Jaemin says, eyes trained on Jeno's finger that is bleeding in the slightest and Jeno coils at the attention. "Injun, do you have a nail clipper?"</p><p> </p><p>Renjun didn't answer and the next thing Jeno hears are loud foodsteps, making a run in his own home. </p><p> </p><p>"Does it hurt?" Jaemin looks up at him. </p><p> </p><p>They're too close enough for Jeno to have a difficulty in his breathing. "N-no, not at all." What is he doing? It should be the right time for Jeno to pull his hand away from Jaemin, the cause of the weird feeling in his stomach. </p><p> </p><p>"What are you doing, hurting your pretty hands?"</p><p> </p><p>Jeno's mouth dries like a dessert. Half his mind thinking he's being flirt with and he should let out a reaction, the other half musing, no, he's just checking on you as Renjun's friend without motive. "It's fine. Jaemin." Jeno manages to blurt out. </p><p> </p><p>Jaemin looks up at him again, his eyes nowhere on Jeno's but somewhere below. His lips, Jeno guesses. Jaemin is staring at Jeno's lips unabashed. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i uploaded this because im sure i wouldn't get anything done if i dont pressure myself into writing it. Part 2 should be up soon!</p><p>i know im not a good writer like the others but im really trying my best and always appreciate everyone who reads and kudos and comment on my stories. I will try to improve more.</p><p> Thank you very much for supporting my other stories too!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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